Merry Christmas everyone!
I hope you are all having an amazing time with your loved ones. And if this Christmas was not exactly what you imagined it to be, remember that we all go through cycles of happier and less happy days and things always work out in the end ✨
As we move towards 2020, I wanted to write a blog post that wraps up 2019. 2018 was an emotionally intense year for me as I went through a turmoil of extreme feelings of amazing joy and heartbreaking sadness. So when 2019 came along, my wish was for it to be a very peaceful year. Apart from good health for the people I love, I wanted no changes, no surprises, just a full year of blissful nothingness.
Luckily, 2019 obliged and nothing much happened on the outside. I had a very happy year full of beautiful experiences including our honeymoon in Dubai, Maldives and Singapore, the arrival of the babies of some of my closest friends, been asked to be a Godmother, nice break-aways and getting my British citizenship.
Things weren’t so peaceful on the inside though. 2018 with all its intensity may have passed but it left me in a state of internal anxiety higher to what I’m used to. I spent most of 2019 worrying about things that never actually happened in the end, making worse case scenarios for trivial and less trivial things.
I was trying to find the reason why I was experiencing this and the thing that I read that felt like the best explanation was that when the mind is on a fight or flight mode, it creates worse case scenarios to be prepared to face any possible adversity.
So I had work to do to reassure my mind. I tried many things, from meditation and journaling to reading books and writing affirmations. I was tiring myself with all these thoughts so I was determined to find relief.
Towards the end of 2019 all the above finally made a difference and I can say that the anxiety has decreased massively giving way to positivity, hope and a feeling of faith that everything is going to be ok. I am planning to continue working on it by completing a mindfulness course and trying to stay more present and worry less about the future.
So in 2020 I am ready again for some happy surprises! And I am going to work on myself to improve the way I experience the unhappy ones. I want this to be my best year so far and I will do my best to make it happen!
My wish for you is for 2020 to be everything you want it to be.